Uncanny X-Men #496 unofficial spoiled recap, discuss without needing tags

[Ann Nichols]

THIS IS AN UNOFFICIAL, ANNOTATED, OPINIONATED RECAP. THE OFFICIAL REVIEWS ARE HERE: http://www.comixfan.com/xfan/forums/...isplay.php?f=4

THE OFFICIAL ISSUE SUMMARIES ARE HERE:
http://www.comixfan.com/xfan/forums/...splay.php?f=48


THIS RECAP WAS POSTED LATER THAN THE ON-SALE DATE AS A COURTESY TO THE WRITER.

COVER: Piotr Rasputin (Colossus) in his metal form, his shirt and pants torn -- not to mention full of bullet holes, is in front. James Logan Howlett (Wolverine) and Kurt Wagner (Nightcrawler) stand back-to-back behind Piotr. All three men look ready to fight. Kurt's visible foot is bare, by the way.

Writer: Mr. Ed Brubaker, Artist: Mr. Mike Choi, Colorist: Ms. Sonia Oback, Letterer: VC's [Virtual Calligraphy's] Mr. Joe Caramagna, Cover Artist: Mr. Choi, Assistant Editor: Mr. Will Panzo, Editor: Mr. Nick Lowe, Editor In Chief: Mr. Joe Quesada, Publisher: Mr. Dan Buckley

Story Arc title: "X-Men Divided, Part Two"

SPOILER!

RECAP PAGE:

Professor Charles Xavier has long championed a dream of peaceful coexistence between mutants and humans. To that end, his team of mutant X-Men are charged to protect a world that hates and fears them. It used to be said rhat the X-Men were sworn to protect a world that hates and fears them. Considering the way things have been going lately, I'm not surprised that "sworn" has been changed to "charged".

Previously in UNCANNY X-MEN...

Returning from a vacation to the Savage Land with Emma Frost, Cyclops found Iron Man at the sight (sic) of the ruined Xavier Mansion. Iron Man proposed that Cyclops and his fellow mutants aid the agents of the Super Hero Registration Act, but Cyclops informed him the X-Men are [were] now disbanded. Meanwhile, Colossus, Nightcrawler, and Wolverine continued their trip through Europe while Angel landed in San Francisco - only to discover that the entire city has morphed into a far out (sic) version of itself from the summer of '69.


********
"Returning from a vacation to the Savage Land" -- see UXM #495, which I don't have.

"Cyclops found Iron Man at the sight (sic) of the ruined Xavier Mansion." This is why one should never trust a computer to check one's spelling. "Sight" is spelled correctly, but "site" is the proper word for that sentence.

Super Hero/Superhero Registration Act: http://www.marvel.com/universe/Civil_War
http://www.answers.com/Super%20Hero%...stration%20Act

"far out" becomes "far-out" when used as an adjective, as it is being used here.

San Francisco and rock music in 1969: http://www.sfmuseum.org/hist1/rock.html

Luckily, it's not likely that the X-Men will have to worry about the Zodiac Killer:
http://www.zodiackillerfacts.com/
http://www.crimelibrary.com/serial_k...c/river_1.html
********

PAGE ONE:

[A young man and a young woman are dancing.]

(NARRATIVE BOX): She dances across the floor as the needle hits the groove and the beat of the party goes --

MUSIC: BUMP BOMP BONNANA NAH NAH NUH NUH

[dancing feet, among them two that are white with toenails that are claws, and a bit of white tail showing] :Hep:

...INNA GADDA DA VIDA... HONEY...

MUSIC: BUMP BOMP BONNANANAH NAH NUH NUH

[The two dancing from above, another young woman, and Hepzibah -- dressed in big hoop earrings, a fringe-sleeved top, wearing a bead necklace (don't make me call them "love beads", OK?), and two bangles on each wrist.]

(NARRATIVE BOXES): First their goddess brought them the cat-lady and the party loved her for it...

MUSIC: ...DON'CHA KNO' THAT I LOOOVE... YOUUUU...

********
"...DON'CHA KNO' THAT I LOOOVE... YOUUUU..." = "Don't you know that I love you"

video of Iron Butterfly performing "Inna Gada Da Vida" in 1968
http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fu...oid=2012458514

********

PAGE TWO:

[The two dancers from the first panel of p.1 are looking out through a window. Three young women watch as Warren is in the air not far above them, with his arms slightly out, hands with palms up, held toward them. His feet are bare and so is his chest. I think he's wearing a fringed buckskin jacket with his brown jeans (?). I'm not sure what the design on his belt buckle is. He has shoulder-length hair. It looks better than his hair in this week's "X-Factor" v.3, #2, at least to a middle-aged woman who was a girl in the 1960s. ]

(NARRATIVE BOXES): ...she's brought them an angel. This... is the best party ever.

********
This fringed jacket isn't the same as Warren's, but it might give you some idea what his looks like:
http://www.sixtiescity.com/CultTV/images/cheyenne1.jpg
********

PAGE THREE:

[Long-haired, bearded young man sitting on the steps in front of a house. A young woman sits on the step below him. Two more people walk hand-in-hand in the foreground]

ELI: I don't understand, Delilah... where did the angel come from?
DELILAH: Opal thinks he's another gift. He just arrived... with the last wave from the Haight

[Eli's head was turned away from Delilah, but now it's turned toward her. She touches his forehead with her forefinger.]

ELI: I've never seen anything like this, not even... when we were us. Not even in the real.
DELILAH: There is no real, Eli... We've knocked open those doors.

[Eli is standing and obviously intends to go inside. Delilah starts to stand, allowing us to see that the "v" neckline of her dress goes all the way down to her waist.]

ELI: Not us... The goddess did that.
DELILAH: But she's one of us now, isn't she?
ELI: I don't know what she is....

[Eli knocks on a green door that has a bare light bulb (lit), hanging in front of it. KNK KNNK From the slant of the walls, I would not be surprised if the door is to the house's attic. Note the flowers painted on the brick walls on either side of the door.]

ELI: Goddess? May I come in?

[Eli enters a room in which are swirls of smoke or mist or wind. A brownish hand is held out toward him, palm down. If she's revealed to be Ororo (Storm) in a later issue, I hope her husband won't be too angry.]

WOMAN ADDRESSED AS "GODDESS": Of course, my love... Come join me... And all that I am is yours...
ELI: That's... the best news I've ever heard. If this were a horror movie, that would be his cue to be killed.

********
Haight-Ashbury: http://www.sfgate.com/traveler/guide...s/haight.shtml
http://www.sanfranciscobay.com/haightashbury/
********

PAGE FOUR:

[It's raining, it's pouring, and Scott is piloting one of the Blackbird jets, Emma in the seat next to his. Her hair is up in a bun. It looks nice. Is that the jet's shadow in the water below?]

CYCLOPS: This isn't good, Emma. Warren's not answering and I can't even tell if my calls are going through.
EMMA FROST: You needn't narrate, Dearest... I'm sitting right here. And the situation is worse than you know.

[Close-up headshots (profile shot for Scott) Is Emma wearing too much mascara? She's frowning]

CYCLOPS: What does that mean? Have you made a link?
EMMA FROST: No, that's the problem.

[profile shot of Emma, her visible eye closed, her hand to her head -- basic telepath trying to concentrate pose]

EMMA FROST: I should be able to find his mind... even from this distance, but I can't. And I can't find Hepzibah or any of the others he was meant to be meeting there.

[Tiny Blackbird jet, a streak of blue among the dark clouds, choppy waves below]

EMMA FROST: It's like [as if] they're all being blocked from me.... ... or worse. DUN DUN DUNNNNNN!


********
DUN DUN DUNNNNNN! = the ominous music heard right after a ominous TV/telley show has an ominous revelation just before the commercials start
********


PAGE FIVE:

[It's a cemetary with a stone angel over one of the tombstones.]

(CAPTION) AND ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WORLD

[Logan and Kurt stand behind Piotr, who stands before a grave. Piotr is wearing a ribbed gray pullover sweater ("jumper" if you speak English English), dark pants, shoes, a long brown coat, and a long striped muffler/scarf. Piotr's hat is in his left hand. A bouquet of white roses wrapped in paper is in his left. There's lots of snow on the ground. We can see Logan and Kurt's breath. Logan is wearing a plain dark shirt, a cowboy hat, a sheepskin jacket, jeans, and boots. Kurt, still using his image inducer, is wearing a maroon scarf neatly tucked inside his olive green coat. His pants and nice shoes are dark. Kurt's fur hat is also on his head. He still has that gold-handled cane. Don't ask me why Logan and Kurt haven't removed their hats to show respect for Piotr's dead.]

[Peter lays the roses on the grave. I can't read the Cyrillic alphabet, but I'm guessing the names are of his parents, Nikolai Rasputin and Alexandra Rasputina.]

[headshots for Logan and Kurt, but we can see Piotr's upper chest as well as his head. He looks very sad. His friends look sympathetic.]

WOLVERINE: Pete? How ya doin', pal?
COLOSSUS: My heart is heavy, my friends. But what more did I expect, returning to this place?

********
"Pete" is a nickname for "Peter." "Piotr" is the Russian version of "Peter." When Piotr joined the X-Men, they called him "Peter" and often call him that now.

[doin' = nonstandard American English for "doing"]

[ya = nonstandard American English for "you"]
********

PAGE SIX:

[Kurt, looking troubled/sympathethic, puts a hand on Piotr's back as he looks again at his parents' tombstone. We can barely see the roses because Piotr's scarf/muffler end is blocking our view]

NIGHTCRAWLER: Yes. We pay our respects to the dead to honor them... and yet it often tears open the very holes they left in our lives once more.

[We see our heroes as if we were hovering above them. Piotr has already started walking away. He's shrugging. Kurt and Logan watch him.]

COLOSSUS: I thought feeling the Siberian winter again would restore something to me. But all it does is remind me how much I have lost.

[It's getting darker. We can see lights in the background. Logan's head is bowed so his hat hides his upper face, but he's smiling slightly. Kurt tilts his head toward Logan. He's smiling, too. In the foreground, Piotr puts his hat on. We can see his breath.]

COLOSSUS: They were good people... This was a good place to be a child.
WOLVERINE: You know what I'm wondering?
NIGHTCRAWLER: What?

[Nice Logan headshot]

WOLVERINE: If it's a good place to get a drink?

[Piotr's breath shows again as he looks over his shoulder. He's smiling a little.]

COLOSSUS: This is Russia, Logan... I would not worry too hard on [about] that.

********
Siberia: http://www.answers.com/topic/siberia?cat=travel

"If it's a good place to get a drink." -- Logan means alcoholic drinks
********

PAGE SEVEN:

[The lights are on in a tavern/bar. The door is open. It's snowing. Two people are walking through the snow. There's a church in the distance. There are other buildings, too, and 3 cars in view. One is completely covered with snow. If you look closely at the bigger snowflakes in the panels taking place outside, you'll see that they are made to look as if they actual snowflakes and not just dots.]

[The bar's tables have built-in chessboards. Two men are playing chess at their table. Two more are drinking at the counter (bar). A bartender is tending the bar. Our three are sitting at a table in a corner in front of a window. Logan has the chair in front of the window, Piotr has the chair in front of the other wall, and Kurt sits in the chair nearest the fireplace. Yes, there's a fire in the fireplace.]

WOLVERINE: What're you lookin' for. Elf? Juggernaut?
NIGHTCRAWLER: I was seeing if they had the train schedules posted. Wondering if we might make the last train out...

[Logan (hidden by his hat), Piotr, Kurt]

NIGHTCRAWLER: Unless you wish to stay another night, Piotr?
COLOSSUS: No... I think I have gotten whatever it is I came back here for.

[close-up of Logan's head -- I think he's wiping his mouth with his sleeve. Ick The snow seems to be falling faster from what we see through the window behind Logan.]

WOLVERINE: So... was this a place you used to come? You an' yer farmer buddies?

********
[lookin' = nonstandard American English for "looking"]

"Elf" is Kurt's nickname.

Juggernaut: Professor X's older stepbrother, villain, then reformed villain & X-Man, then a member of Excalibur, and back to being a villain. http://www.uncannyxmen.net/db/spotli...=10&fldAuto=96

[an' = nonstandard American English for "and"]

[yer = nonstandard American English for "your" or "you're"]
********

PAGE EIGHT:

[Logan (hat and left sideburn/shoulder), Piotr (sad profile) ]

COLOSSUS: No, Logan, this is merely the closest bar to the cemetary. My village is miles from here. Away off in the snow.

[I can't tell if Piotr's eyes are colored brown, gray, blue, or steel blue in this issue. They're supposed to be blue. Anyway, he looks very serious in this panel. Logan is seen from behind]

COLOSSUS: But I thought it best to avoid a literal homecoming... since all who live there believe I'm dead.
WOLVERINE: Good point.

[profile shots, Logan to the left, Kurt to the right, facing each other - Logan touches the underside of the front brim of his hat with his right thumb, probably pushing it up. He's not looking directly at Kurt, who is frowning at him.]

WOLVERINE: But just 'cause we're drinkin' doesn't mean you should wallow in it. &
NIGHTCRAWLER: Logan.
WOLVERINE: What?
NIGHTCRAWLER: That's even more insensitive than usual.

[Piotr has his head bowed, eyes closed, and is frowning slightly. Kurt looks at him with sympathy.]

NIGHTCRAWLER: "The man has just visited his parents' grave... ... and just a few weeks ago he lost the woman he loves." It serves Marvel right not to have made sure that "Giant-Size Astonishing X-Men" #1 came out first -- unless they hope this hint will increase sales.

[profile of Logan with slight grin, Piotr the same as the last panel, Kurt looking depressed]

WOLVERINE: Let's not forget watchin' everything we know get demolished... ... an' all our friends scattered in the breeze.

********
Scroll down to find out how Colossus died. From the Spotlight on Colossus: http://www.uncannyxmen.net/db/spotli...Auto=77&page=6
Reprinted in the X-Men: Dream's End TPB, ISBN-10: 078511551X & ISBN-13: 978-0785115519 (Bishop #16, Cable #87, Uncanny X-Men #388-390, & X-Men v.2, #108-110)

How Colossus came back to life:
http://www.uncannyxmen.net/db/spotli...Auto=77&page=7
Reprinted in the Astonishing X-Men: Gifted TPB, ISBN-10: 0785115315 & ISBN-13: 978-0785115311 (AXM v.3, issues 1-6)
Also reprinted in the Astonishing X-Men hardcover volume one, ISBN-10: 0785123016 & ISBN-13: 978-0785123019
(AXM v.3, issues 1-12) (which may be unavailable right now -- check your local comics shop)

Enjoy this explanation of how Colossus died and came back: http://www.thexaxis.com/indexes/uncannyxmen/390.htm
(follow the index entry's link to the X-Axis review of UXM #390 -- it's even more scathing.)

['cause = nonstandard American English for "because"]

[drinkin' = nonstandard American English for "drinking"]

"What?" Logan is using "what" in its "What is it?/What do you want?/What's the matter?/What did I do to annoy you (or make you mad)? sense.

[watchin' = nonstandard American English for "watching"]

"all our friends scattered in the breeze" -- a poetic way to say that they have gone away in different directions
********

PAGE NINE:

[full figure shots (except for the table hiding Piotr's lower half) of our heroes. Piotr has one tall glass in his hand. There are two sitting in front of Kurt, who looks very dapper in his suit. Logan has two tall glasses, 3 smaller ones lying on the floor next to him, and 4 even smaller ones (shot glasses?) next to the two big ones. Kurt has his right hand on the table and his left flung out. Logan has both arms out, elbows crooked, hands held palms up]

NIGHTCRAWLER: No, let us not forget that. Let's not forget that right now our entire future is up in the air.
WOLVERINE: But it always is, Elf... That's my point.

[Logan adjusts his hat. There's a hint of a sneer on his lips.]

WOLVERINE: It's one thing after another, an' it always has been. An' Pete knows that. That's what life with the X-Men is.

[Logan reaches over to poke Piotr in the chest. Piotr gives him a bit of a challenging sneer in return]

WOLVERINE: You're sayin' "whatever you came back for" (sic) like [as if] you don't know. But I'll tell you what it is.
COLOSSUS: Oh, will you now?

[OK, did Logan make a circle and an "X" in the frost on the window? He's got one hand held against the window.Piotr's back to having his head bowed, eyes closed, and looking depressed. Logan is looking up, at the "X," I think. He's not grinning. His eyes are a particularly beautiful cornflower blue in this and the next panel]

WOLVERINE: Yeah, I will. You wanted to remember what it felt like before... when no one knew what you were... when it was simple.

[Logan looks at Piotr now, sadness or regret on his face -- his hand is still against the window]

WOLVERINE: An' when Charlie Xavier's dreams sounded like hope...

********
"up in the air" = "Not settled, uncertain, as in The proposal to build a golf course next to the airport is still up in the air. This metaphoric expression likens something floating in the air to an unsettled matter. Put as in the air from the mid-1700s, it acquired up in the first half of the 1900s". The American Heritage® Dictionary of Idioms. Houghton Mifflin Company, 1992. Answers.com 08 Mar. 2008. http://www.answers.com/topic/up-in-the-air (there are no translations into other languages, sorry)

"whatever you came back for" -- that's an idirect quotation, so it shouldn't have quotation marks.

[sayin' = nonstandard American English for "saying"]
********

PAGE TEN:

[Piotr, still downcast. His glass is on the table, but his hand is held as if it were still curved around it. Logan in profile]

WOLVERINE: ...instead'a what they turned out to be. A big mess...
COLOSSUS: I suppose you're right...

[Piotr opens his eyes. They are brimming with tears. His chin is held between his left thumb and forefinger.]

COLOSSUS: This countryside... my mother and father... my sister... ...and my darling... my Katya...

[Piotr's clasped hands pressed under his lower lip, his eyes closed, tears rolling down his right cheek and about to spill over on to his left cheek]

COLOSSUS: ... these are things that the X-Men have cost me... whether I wish to admit it or not.

[Logan is standing, his eyes closed, his expression downcast. Kurt, also standing has reached over and put a hand on Piotr's left shoulder. His suit keeps switching from being a solid color to pin striped.} Piotr's head is still bowed.]

WOLVERINE: Nah. Yer wrong again. That's just the cost of bein' a mutant in this world.

[Logan gives Piotr a half-smile. Piotr, apparently wiping the tears from his cheek with the back of his left hand, gives him a weak smile in return]

WOLVERINE: But if you wanna talk about Kitty, then let's talk. See, I can keep stuff bottled up, I'm used to... but you... That ain't you, Petey.

[Logan and Kurt standing, Piotr still sitting, Bartender (a crutch under his left armpit) in the foreground. Customer still seated at the counter. Kurt and Piotr are smiling slightly.]

WOLVERINE: <Bartender! Another round, we got a broken heart here.>
BARTENDER: <And I've got a broken leg... Come get it yourself, foreigner!> It wasn't necessary to call him a "foreigner" as if it were an insult.

********
[instead'a = nonstandard American English for "instead of"]

Piotr's family tree: http://www.uncannyxmen.net/db/articl...q=8&fldAuto=89

How Illyana died: http://www.uncannyxmen.net/db/spotli...Auto=85&page=5
(She's supposed to come back, I believe)

"Katya": Katherine "Kitty" Pryde -- "Shadowcat"
http://www.uncannyxmen.net/db/spotli...Auto=72&page=8

[Nah = nonstandard American English for "no"]

[yer = nonstandard American English for "your" or "you're"] (Here, Logan means "you're")

[bein' = nonstandard American English for "being"]

[wanna = nonstandard American English for "want to"]

"keep stuff bottled up" = variation of "keep things bottled up inside" = an expression for not allowing oneself to feel or express emotions about things that bother or trouble or traumatize one.

"That ain't you, Petey" = that's not the way you are, Petey

[ain't = nonstandard American English for "isn't" or "aren't"]

"Another round, we got a broken heart here" = "Bring us each another drink, one of us has a broken heart"

<> around dialogue means the dialogue has been translated from another language.

"Broken heart" = "A [b]broken[b] heart (or heartbreak) is a common metaphor used when a human being suffers an emotional or physical loss, to the extent that it begins to cause them physical or psychological pain."
Wikipedia. Wikipedia, 2008. Answers.com 08 Mar. 2008. http://www.answers.com/topic/broken-heart-1
(there are no translations into other languages, sorry)
********


PAGE ELEVEN:

[cloudy skies, Blackbird jet, trees, fence, giant in what appears to be golden armor with glowing red eyes and mouth grill. I wonder if there's any graffiti on his feet.]

(CAPTION) GOLDEN GATE PARK -- SAN FRANCISCO

CYCLOPS (OFF-PANEL): What's that?
EMMA FROST (OFF-PANEL): A Celestial, I think.
CYCLOPS (OFF-PANEL): Do I even want to know what a Celestial is? See the annotations for this page for why Scott should know about Celestials.

[Emma and Scott with their heads turned to look toward the Celestial.]

EMMA FROST: You're going to have to learn at some point, I'm sure.
CYCLOPS: But why is it here?
EMMA FROST: From what I understand, it's sleeping here until the end of the world.

[Emma's smile, a long strand of loose hair hanging in front of her face (doesn't she know what bobby pins are for?), Scott still looking.]

CYCLOPS: Oh, Okay...

[Emma's profile, her eyes closed, her mouth downturned -- is she a bit sad? Scott profile -- I think he's landing the jet]

EMMA FROST: Henry would probably have more information. I'm just telling you what I know from osmosis.

[We see the couple from a different viewpoint, so Scott (his head turned toward Emma) is on the left and the shrugging Emma is on the right]

CYCLOPS: Osmosis?
EMMA FROST: Yes. Things I learn from the thought fractals floating in the ether. The constant background noise of being a telepath.

********
The Golden Gate Park is a Haight-Ashbury Park http://www.inetours.com/Pages/SFNbrh...Gate_Park.html

Celestials: http://www.marvel.com/universe/Celestials

Thanks to J. D. Francesco's post here: http://www.comixfan.com/xfan/forums/...39&postcount=9 , I learned about "Judgment War" in "X-Factor" v.1. There are no summaries of the issues involved at uncannyxmen.net, but here are some:
"X-Factor" v.1, #43: http://www.snikt.com/COTA/Comic_Book...Issues/043.htm
#44: http://www.snikt.com/COTA/Comic_Book...Issues/044.htm
#45: http://www.snikt.com/COTA/Comic_Book...Issues/045.htm
#46: http://www.snikt.com/COTA/Comic_Book...Issues/046.htm
#47: http://www.snikt.com/COTA/Comic_Book...Issues/047.htm (interlude issue)
#48: http://www.snikt.com/COTA/Comic_Book...Issues/048.htm
#49: http://www.snikt.com/COTA/Comic_Book...Issues/049.htm
#50: http://www.snikt.com/COTA/Comic_Book...Issues/050.htm

So, were the memories of the original X-Factor team wiped free after the Judgment War? If not, I would think Scott would remember almost being crushed by a Celestial.
Arishem the Judge: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arishem_the_Judge
http://www.comicvine.com/arishem/32857/
Celestials: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Celestial_(comics)

"Oh, Okay..." = similar to "Oh... kay..." = a relatively polite reaction when the speaker is confronted with something s/he finds very strange or doesn't like. It's a weaker version of

Henry = the Beast, one of the 5 original X-Men, a friend of Emma's, and like a brother to Scott ( one of the 4 other surviving original X-Men). Henry, or Hank, is probably closer to Scott than the last two survivers, Angel and Iceman (Bobby).
********

PAGE TWELVE:

[Emma looking toward our left as Scott activates a little device in his hand. The jet is fading away from view. I really hate this version of Emma's cape. When her arms are down, it looks as if she's wearing a sheet that's tucked into the top of a strapless bra.]

BLACKBIRD JET: Stealth mode activated.
EMMA FROST: Anyway, let's worry about the giant alien god creature if and when it wakes up. We've got other problems right now, my love. That's practically begging that Celestial to wake up!
CYCLOPS: What is it? You getting anything?

[Emma, eyes closed, using her right hand to gesture for Scott to be quiet and her left hand to help her focus. That appears to be a pearl stud earring in her right ear. Scott, in profile, looks grim.]

EMMA FROST: Yes, there's an enormous psychic pulse... it's like [as if] it's rippling right past us. Hang on. I'm shielding us from it.

[Emma holds her cape in her hands as she and Scott walk down a path. Eight hippies are standing, sitting, or lying on blankets or the grass itself. The legs of the Celestial can still be seen in the background. I wonder if he's a tourist attraction.]

CYCLOPS: So that's what's doing all this? Making these people look like [as if] they stepped right out of the '60s?

[Scott and Emma seen from behind, 3 of the hippies' heads seen from behind as they watch the couple. Four hippies, one with a dog on a leash, are standing on the path further down from the X-couple.]

CYCLOPS: It's all some psychic mental projection?
EMMA FROST: Sort of, yes... but I've never experienced anything like this... It feels wild... not focused.

********
At least this change doesn't seem as bad as what Kulan Gath pulled off in "Uncanny X-Men" #190-191. Issue summaries:
#190: http://uncannyxmen.net/db/issues/sho...sp?fldAuto=496
#191: http://uncannyxmen.net/db/issues/sho...sp?fldAuto=497
Reprinted in the Essential X-Men, volume five, 2nd edition black & white TPB, ISBN-10: 0785126929 & ISBN-13: 978-0785126928 ("Uncanny X-Men" issues 180-198 & Annuals # 7-8)
********

PAGE THIRTEEN:

[Scott and Emma have reached the hippies standing in the path. One of the young women has the sun painted on her left cheek and a crescent moon painted on her right. A young man wearing yellow glasses reaches out toward Scott with his right hand. His left forefinger is sticking straight up, but his left fingers are not curled up]

EMMA FROST: I'm not sure if this is being done on purpose. Someone else's power interacting with the Celestial?
MELLOW HIPPIE: Wow... Check it out... Trippy goggles man.

[Emma watches Scott, who looks angry. The hippie holds up his hands in the "Hey, don't get mad, I didn't mean to upset you" gesture. I cringe as I am reminded of one of the least bearable episodes from season three of classic "Star Trek" -- "The Way to Eden."]

CYCLOPS: Keep away from us.
MELLOW HIPPIE: Okay, man. Be cool. Be mellow.

[Emma and Scott are walking away from the four. The dog doesn't growl or bark. The woman with the painted face holds the other woman, who has a hand on the shoulder of the hippie with the yellow glasses. He shurgs. The other holds out his right hand, palm up. ]

MELLOW HIPPIE: I guess they aren't comin' to the be-in.
CYCLOPS: So you're telling me someone is psychically taking this city back in time... and they may not even know they're doing it?

[Emma frowns a little]

EMMA FROST: I'm not sure... But this doesn't feel like an attack, Scott.

[Emma and Scott are about to walk through an opening in the fence. The background beyond that fence is blurred.]

EMMA FROST: Feels more like an acid flashback creeping through the city.
CYCLOPS: I'm guessing Warren and the others aren't having a good trip. We better find them fast...

Everyone I've seen so far is young, thin, and attractive. Where are the fat, homely, ugly, middle-aged, and old San Franciscans?

********
"Check it out" = take notice of this

"Trippy" = Outdated 1960s slang derived from the "trip" that meant one had taken a hallucinogenic drug, such as LSD ("acid"). This hippie thinks Scott's visor looks weird. I think it's just ugly.

"The Way to Eden": http://www.tv.com/star-trek/the-way-...st;ep_title;19
Meet the Space Hippies: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MRewcZXEMb8
One of the songs from that episode: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MnSa6...eature=related

Wikipedia on the Be-In. Hey, I was only 11 for most of 1967. http://www.answers.com/be-in

acid flashbacks are mentioned here in the 5th paragraph under "health hazards": http://www.nida.nih.gov/Infofacts/LSD.html
********

PAGE FOURTEEN:

[Two cars parked so that they block the way, nine men in view, one getting out of one of the cars, some walking toward the bar, one opening the door for another. Many of them are carrying what, according to MikeB's post, are Uzis. Thanks! I wouldn't have known. http://www.comixfan.com/xfan/forums/...&postcount=23]

(CAPTION) AND BACK IN RUSSIA

WOLVERINE (OFF-PANEL): -- know who I miss?

[Logan has a hand on Piotr's shoulder. Piotr does a spit-take. Kurt holds up his hand to fend off the spit-take]

WOLVERINE: The Blob.
COLOSSUS: Pssht -- the Blob?!
WOLVERINE: Yeah, I'm tired of skinny little weasely bad guys.

[Customer at the Counter scowls as a tall, muscular man with a crew cut grabs the bartender and points an Uzi at him. The other creeps are blurred. The bartender's crutch is resting against the bar, next to him. Both the gunman and the bartender are frowning at each other.]

BULLY WITH CREWCUT: <I said give it now, you dog-eating bastard!>
BARTENDER: <Stop!>

[headshot -- the bartender is defiant even though the gun is almost touching his left cheek. If this guy is the reason the bartender has a broken leg, the man is either very brave or very foolhardy.]

BARTENDER: <You've taken more than I can afford already!> <You scum.>

[The vile gunman hits the bartender in the face with his gun. KRAK]

BARTENDER (VERY BIG BLACK LETTERS THAT SPILL OVER THE BORDER OF THE WORD BALLOON): AHH --!

********
History of the Uzi: http://www.uzi.com/history.html

The Blob: http://www.marvel.com/universe/Blob
http://www.comixfan.com/xfan/forums/...ead.php?t=1761
http://www.marveldirectory.com/individuals/b/blob.htm (scroll down for a front, back, and side view)
You don't want to see a picture of depowered Blob with all that loose skin hanging down (so it's just as well that a quick search didn't find me one)...

"A spit-take is a comedic technique in which someone spits a beverage out of his or her mouth when he or she reacts to a statement during a take. In a spit-take, the reaction is usually one of surprise. Danny Thomas is sometimes credited with popularizing its use in comedy." Wikipedia. Wikipedia, 2008. Answers.com 09 Mar. 2008. http://www.answers.com/topic/spit-take (there are no translations into other languages, sorry)
********

PAGE FIFTEEN:

[headshots -- blood running from bartender's right nostril, crew-cut bully turning his head to yell at a subordinate]

BULLY WITH CREWCUT: <Milo, get the money.>
WOLVERINE (OFF-PANEL) (VERY BIG BLACK LETTERS) : HEY!

[Hee -- big panel with Logan looking sternly (and letting his claws out -- SNIKT), at the crew-cut bully, who points his Uzi at his chest. Behind Logan, Piotr looks alert. What I love is Kurt's apologetic smile that suggests one should forgive his friend's lack of manners.]

WOLVERINE: <What the hell are you doing?> <You don't assault the bartender.>

[We don't see much of the chief bully's face aside from his nose, mouth, and chin -- the panel's focus is on his Uzi losing three pieces because Logan has already cut through it. SHUKK]

BULLY WITH CREWCUT: <This is none of your concern.>

[hand shot -- Logan has slightly retracted the middle claw on his left hand so that it doesn't cut the crew-cut bully's nose as the other two claws are very, very close to putting that evil man's eyes out. The crew-cut bully looks understandably frightened. Two of his men are watching. Our view of them is a little blurred, but one has a short Mohawk and the other is a long-haired bully with sunglasses.]

WOLVERINE: <Man's pouring my drinks. Makes it my concern.>
BULLY WITH CREWCUT: <What are you...?

********
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" -- if the speaker can see what the other person is doing and the answer should be obvious to the speaker, this is a rude way of letting the other person know you don't approve of what s/he is doing and s/he should stop doing right NOW/
********

PAGE SIXTEEN:

[The two background bullies aim their guns at Logan, who retracts his claws. Logan's visible eye is narrowed. The fool bully on the left is smiling.]

WOLVERINE: <Someone who's really tired of bullies.>

[In a nice panel, Logan punches crew-cut bully with his left fist (blood flies from the bully's mouth) KRAKK, breaks the long-haired bully's sunglasses and sends him falling backwards by kicking him in the head with his left foot WHAKK. Mohawk bully is trying to shield his face.]

[Logan knocks over something (a chair? a stool?) as he dodges bullets. RATATATATATAT A piece of wood is gouged out of the wooden shelf above and behind Logan. Some of the bottles of booze on the shelf are broken.]

OFF-PANEL BULLY: <Get them! Kill them!>

[Mohawk bully looks over his shoulder (his Uzi is smoking), as Piotr raises his left fist and puts his right hand on the bully's right shoulder.]

COLOSSUS: <You people are a disgrace.>
Be grateful you're not villains appearing in "X-Force" -- you'll probably live!

********
short Mohawk photo (yes, the bully has the rest of his scalp shaved): http://www.istockphoto.com/file_clos....php?id=674180
********

PAGE SEVENTEEN:

[Mohawk bully's bullets miss as Piotr punches him in the face. WHUDD]

[Logan smiles brightly as he grabs well-groomed bully by the throat with his right hand while shaved head-bully grabs his left arm.
Some bully's feet and part of his legs may be seen upsidedown behind Logan. To the left, in the background, someone appears to be using his gun as a club. To the right, also in the background, someone just got punched.]

[Ha! Kurt takes on two bullies at once, leaping at the one on the right to take him down (that Uzi is probably putting holes in the roof), and slamming his cane tip into the neck of the one on the left.]

[Piotr is busy knocking Mohawk bully and balding bully's heads together, but he takes the time to look over his shoulder to smile at Logan, who gives him a very happy smile in return.]

PAGE EIGHTEEN:

[A customer who is shielding himself with an overturned table peeks over it in time to see Logan get shot in the back of his right shoulder]

WOLVERINE (VERY BIG RED LETTERS THAT SPILL OVER THE BORDER OF THE WORD BALLOON): AHHH!

[The customer cringes behind the table as bullets strike the wall above his head. Good thing he wasn't peeking anymore.]

[A bullet smashes a corner of the table, but the customer is no longer there. BAMF]

[Kurt looks like himself (except that his hair has that boring straight look that Mr. Tan used instead of Kurt's natural waves), but he's still in the suit. The customer is in his arms. They're outside with the falling snow. The customer looks frightened, poor man. BAMF]

NIGHTCRAWLER: <Go... run from here.>

[Kurt is back inside the bar. Piotr looks over his shoulder and smights a grim little smile as he sees Kurt. BAMF]

********
Kurt in his wavy-haired splendor: http://www.uncannyxmen.net/db/spotli...=10&fldAuto=70
********

PAGE NINETEEN:

[Long-haired bully, blood running out of both of his nostrils, is shooting. BRATTATATATAT]

[Kurt flinches behind Piotr, who is taking his metal form. The bullets bouncing off his chest have made sure that his nice sweater/jumper is ready to go in the rag bag.]

[headshot, angry Piotr -- note the steel-colored irises in his steel-colored eyes.

COLOSSUS: <That was not a good idea...> Tovarich [Comrade]

[Smoke coming off Piotr's metal skin (bits of sweater seen, too), Logan with his back to the readers, long-haired bully looking very dismayed]

BULLY WITH LONG, BLONDISH-LIGHT BROWN HAIR: <No... no...>

PAGE TWENTY:

[One long-haired bully flying backward through a window. KKNCHH]

[Kurt squats on top of the counter, smiling. Logan is looking at the bloody bullet hole in the front of his shirt. I think he's irritated that his shirt has been ruined. Piotr stands calmly, so tall that the upper half of his head is sticking into the bottom of panel one. The bartender looks up at them from where he ducked behind the bar. His hands are sticking up in the surrender gesture, but his arms aren't held up over his head.]

WOLVERINE: Elf, you okay?
NIGHTCRAWLER: Yes. It appears I'm more healed than I thought.

[We see only the bartender. His fingers are curled around the top of the counter. His head is above the counter as far as his lower lip. He hasn't wiped the blood from his right nostril away.]

BARTENDER: <Have you killed them?>
COLOSSUS (OFF-PANEL): <They will wish we had tomorrow... Are they Bratva?>
BARTENDER: <No... just local scum.>

[The bartender's eyes open wide as Piotr's hand sets a stack of money with a rubber band (?) around it on the counter]

COLOSSUS: <Sorry for the damage... Hopefully, this'll cover it...> <Best not to mention what you saw here.>
BARTENDER: <Yes... of course.>

********
"Bratva" means "brotherhood" but it also means the Russian Mob, which is the way Piotr is using the word.
http://encyclopedia.thefreedictionary.com/Bratva
********

PAGE TWENTY-ONE:

[Our heroes are leaving. Kurt's image inducer is on again. Logan has his jacket on and is settling his hat on his head. Piotr is putting on his coat. His muffler/scarf is already around his neck, but he doesn't have his hat on. There's an overturned chair or stool in the lower right corner. My, there are a lot of bullet casings (?) to sweep up.]

NIGHTCRAWLER: So, shall we try and make that final train, then, Piotr?
COLOSSUS: I think so.

[Piotr is already going through the open door, Kurt behind him and Logan behind Kurt. We see them from behind.]

COLOSSUS: I think I've seen all I need of my homeland for now.
WOLVERINE: That's the other thing about comin' home...

[Logan, seen from behind, holds the front brim of his hat. This is another panel in which one should enjoy the snowflakes.]

WOLVERINE: ...it usually reminds you why you wanted to leave in the first place. Not everyone leaves because he or she wanted to leave...

[All three on the porch, their heads bowed, their expressions serious. Notice the man peeping from around the corner of the bar?]

COLOSSUS: I suppose so, Logan.

[It's a closer look at the man watching our trio. It's the customer Kurt saved. He doesn't look grateful.]

********
"...shall we try and make that final train..." Kurt is using this definition of "make": "To reach in time: just made the plane." The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition. Houghton Mifflin Company, 2004. Answers.com 09 Mar. 2008. http://www.answers.com/topic/make
********
Would it surprise you to learn that the last page suggests things are not going to go well next issue? Didn't think so.



I'm glad to see that Mr. Brubaker remembered to use <> to indicate the dialogue that was being translated into English.
More than half of the pages are given to Logan, Kurt, & Piotr rather than the San Francisco Pseudo-Sixties Scene, which is fine by me because that storyline interests me more. If you hate the brutality of "X-Force," you should enjoy the fight scene in this issue.
The art is pretty and so is the coloring.


Rabid fan checklist [a cameo, a flashback, a photo/painting even!]: Angel, Colossus, Cyclops, Emma Frost, Hepzibah, Nightcrawler, Wolverine, and someone else

[Brett White]

I really enjoy the old school feel going on right now. This reads like a throw-back to Cockrum's second run on the book, if I'm remembering correctly. But being a comic made today it is complete with headache inducing continuity errors and storytelling problems that are tripled due to the lateness of other books. Seriously. Kitty Pryde is "lost" and we are expected to believe that no one brough this up during "Messiah Complex" or even last issue? And why is it only Colossus who seems marginally upset? The two X-Men that would completely GIVE UP after the death of Kitty are Wolverine and Nightcrawler, hands down. It's not like Pete's out with Iceman and Havok, or any other X-Men who didn't know her that well. And it's not like Lifeguard or, heck, even Dazzler is dead. This is KITTY PRYDE. If lost does mean dead, then every single X-Man should be grieving right now, a lot more than they are.

This is such a mess.

And I have to write this review soon. Oy.

[psi.lock]

What I don't understand, is Kitty was in Endangered species. The arc right before MC, but that happened after breakworld arc, the last chapter of AXM..... the timing does not make sense. They used her for her word??? If she dies at the last arc of AXM, she could not have been in ES.........

[Ann Nichols]

Kitty did appear in the ES back-up story in XM v.2, #201.

[Wicked_Incite]

... Awesome. I've hated Kitty Pryde for years now ^_^

[loganalpha30x3]

Odd, why is Hepzibah here in Uncanny and not in X-Force, or at least at thier headquarters...W/B Warpath/Siryn. I'll go now..............

[City Dweller]

Mike Choi, the artist on this story arc of UXM, mentioned on another bulletin board that wording it as "lost" was meant to be deliberately ambiguous. Since I've grown weary of AXM's publishing schedule, and dead means temporary respite, I'm not so sure I care. -CD

[loganalpha30x3]

Unless we see a body then there's a perfectly good chance that somewhere down the line...W/B Warpath/Siryn. I'll go now.........................

[JD Francesco]

Did I read that right? Scott should know perfectly well what a Celestial is. Judgement War couldn't have been that long ago in Marvel time. If anything he should find the appearance of one on Earth to be at least a little unsettling. I guess Brubaker never read X-Factor.

[peeper]

Originally Posted by Brett White

The two X-Men that would completely GIVE UP after the death of Kitty are Wolverine and Nightcrawler, hands down.

I don't think they would give up at all (c'mon, Logan's watched pretty much all the loves of his life die and Kurt's faith seems to take him through anything), but I'd expect much more of a reaction from them than this.

[JayBezz]

Well we do have one VERY strong telepath in space at the moment and its not like the X-Men don't know how to get into space..

Kitty was getting boring anyhow since Metal Man came back

[gothix]

Originally Posted by JD Francesco

Did I read that right? Scott should know perfectly well what a Celestial is. Judgement War couldn't have been that long ago in Marvel time. If anything he should find the appearance of one on Earth to be at least a little unsettling. I guess Brubaker never read X-Factor.

I'm really enjoying Brubaker but yeah that sort of threw me. I thought that was what editor's were for. I guess maybe Cyclops is a skrull.

I think Wolverine and Nightcrawler are reacting to Kitty's loss the way they are because of Colossus. After all they both are probably more concerned with Peter at the moment.

[Anna P]

Kitty!

[Havok-X2]

Originally Posted by JD Francesco

Did I read that right? Scott should know perfectly well what a Celestial is. Judgement War couldn't have been that long ago in Marvel time. If anything he should find the appearance of one on Earth to be at least a little unsettling. I guess Brubaker never read X-Factor.

I forgot all about that, but you are right. He should know all about that and Ship

[Mad Titan]

I thought that was what editor's were for.

There's been way too many times in the past that we've all thought this. So it makes me wonder..what ARE marvel editors for? We're all FANS of marvel comics and X-Men, and we instantly catch a glaring mistake like Cyclops and the Celestial. The editors are people who get PAID to have a knowledge of the past and catch any mistakes that the writers make. So, how does something like this get missed? Is it the marvel editors simply having a limited knowledge of past X-Men comics? If so, that's a little frustrating, because I'm sure a lot of us would kill to have a job where knowing about the Judgment War is a desired skill. Did the editors know, but simply let it pass because they didn't consider it important enough to change? Or maybe it was simply an oversight and mistake by an editor that does have a deep knowledge of X-Men history?

I'd like to see an X-Editor explain this process over at Comic Book Resources "X-Position."

[Robert Drake]

Originally Posted by City Dweller

Mike Choi, the artist on this story arc of UXM, mentioned on another bulletin board that wording it as "lost" was meant to be deliberately ambiguous. Since I've grown weary of AXM's publishing schedule, and dead means temporary respite, I'm not so sure I care. -CD

Not exactly the words that he used. Like any other fan he was speculating (as he picks up the issues in trade and does not have any inside knowledge).

[impulseucf]

Hmmm. Nice of them to spoil Astonishing for us, absurd delays or not.

[Kizmet]

Given the utterly absurd delays in AXM it wasn't as if they had much choice. The X-Men couldn't go on not reacting to Kitty's death forever and AXM has to end before Messiah Complex.

[Berry]

This issue would have been more entertaining had the "goddess" found herself on Castro instead of Haight

[Anna P]

Originally Posted by Berry

This issue would have been more entertaining had the "goddess" found herself on Castro instead of Haight

Is the "goddess" Storm, or has Seline found a new home?

[Lia Brown]

Originally Posted by Kizmet

Given the utterly absurd delays in AXM it wasn't as if they had much choice. The X-Men couldn't go on not reacting to Kitty's death forever and AXM has to end before Messiah Complex.

Yeah, I don't blame Brubaker et al. It's the fault of the Astonishing creative team (and editors for not reining them in, perhaps). If they wanted to have a major event like killing someone, they should have done a better job putting out their comics on time. They're mucking up the rest of the line.

The bit about Cyke not knowing the Celestials was weird, though. Maybe a Skrull clue.

[Havok-X2]

Originally Posted by impulseucf

Hmmm. Nice of them to spoil Astonishing for us, absurd delays or not.

blame Whedon and/or Cassaday for that

[mikeb]

How come those "shake down" guys at the Russian bar are using UZI's and Mini UZI's in a country that has millions of AK-47s?

[Ann Nichols]

They like their imports?

[Don Quixote]

At least Brubaker didn't specifically tell us what happens/happened to Kitty. But I imagine that he'd have gotten a load of flak if he hadn't mentioned Colossus being upset, and then Astonishing comes out. The guy can't win, and it's hardly his fault that Marvel have made a complete and utter mess of this last arc of Astonishing X-Men.

I liked the Celestial appearance, and don't much care that Cyclops had forgotten what they were. It's the first time it's been mentioned since Gaiman's mini, as far as I know.

Good interactions between the three in Russia, and more indications that Brubaker is finding his feet in the X-verse. But the fact that they keep saying 'Hepzibah and the others' is jarring. Why would you specifically mention her by name, if the others are likely to be people you know much better? So that's either a mistake in the writing, or these 'others' are not X-Men.